It's Summer Troll Season
Posted by Jen Anderson on
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The weather is starting to heat up, and you're starting to dream of summer cookouts, trips to the pool, and leaving the house without a jacket. Sadly, some people continue to be the absolute worst. They think they're entitled to an opinion about us - and that their opinion actually matters to us. It can ruin your whole day.
Summer Trolls and Where They Lurk
You can encounter a troll anywhere people gather. If food is being served, someone may comment on what you are and aren't eating. Show a little skin or walk around in a bathing suit, and someone might comment on your body and whether or not it should be on display.
Not that you should keep your guard up and be ready for battle every time you go outside. But it may help to remind yourself that this could happen before heading out, and plan how to respond. That way you won't be completely blindsided if it does happen.
The Power Of A Snappy Comeback
A good comeback can end the conversation and make the troll go away. There are few things more satisfying than shutting someone down with one sentence. Usually we don't think of that sentence until three days later. Which is why I like to collect them and file them in the back of my mind.
My old standbys include: "And this is your concern why?";"Everyone's entitled to their incorrect opinion,";and "Well actually..." followed by facts and figures. (That's right. Mess with me and I will bore you to death. You asked for it.)
I got my new favorite on Twitter a couple of years ago. At a party, a man cornered a woman and treated her to his poorly-informed opinion. He asked no questions. Just, "well, I think..." When he finished, she said, "OK," and nothing else. Since the guy had been looking for a debate, he was completely flummoxed. And the woman happily escaped to mingle with more pleasant people.
If you can't of anything else in the moment, I hope that you can remember "OK."
The Power of a Cute Outfit
They say the best defense is a good offense. I find that when I'm the most fabulously dressed person in the room, trolls don't bother me like they do when I dress to blend in. Toppers, Cocoon Dusters and Caftans make excellent beach/pool cover ups, and a Sleeveless Shell/Crop Pant combo is more stylish and comfortable than most shorts and tees.
You're Entitled To Your Feelings
We've all heard that Eleanor Roosevelt said that no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. As much as I love a good Eleanor Roosevelt quote, I can't agree with her on this one. Trolls can attack with so much confidence that of course it can throw you off balance. If someone makes you feel less than, you have my permission to cut them out of your life. Even if that disrupts your entire social circle. If your friends don't leap to your defense, or even sort of agree with the troll you clearly need better friends.
Great snappy comebacks! Yes, if you are a larger-sized person who attracts trolls, it helps a lot to have a storehouse of comebacks filed in your brain. My second wife had one that she even used on a doctor or two: Q: Have you ever considered using [fill in weight loss program here]? My sister-in-law just lost 50 pounds on that program! A: No thanks, I’ve given up dieting—I’m fat enough already!