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How To Deal With Trolls In Real Life

Posted by Jen Anderson on

How To Deal With Trolls In Real Life

Some people are so incredibly generous with their opinions that they'll stop strangers on the street to recommend a  diet. They'll tell coworkers that they would look so much better if they lost a few pounds. At parties, they'll let you know what they think about the food on your plate. Online, you'd just block these people. But you can't really do that with the jerk in the next cubicle.

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You are entitled to your feelings. Sure, most of these comments say more about the speaker than they about you. But that doesn't make them any less hurtful. And you're allowed to be hurt.

Becoming tougher isn't going to help anyway. There will always be something that could make you feel like you've been punched. We writers get a lot of harsh criticism. One guy on an internet forum accused me of manslaughter. Repeatedly. I now find it hilarious and brag about it. And yet I still worry about someone commenting on my food choices.

You do not have to change your personality to accommodate other people's bad behavior.

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You can have a lot of fun with random people you will never see again. You can pretend not to understand their point.

"You should really try Keto."

"Why?"

"I've lost 10 pounds on it."

"And?"

"It would be good for your health." 

"Wait - are you telling me that you've seen my medical records?! That's a huge HIPAA violation. Excuse me, I have to call my doctor's office right now and give them a piece of my mind."

plus size clothing new arrivalsMessing with someone can be just as satisfying as telling someone off. 

Trolls At Work

You want to say is, "You don't know anything about my health, and it's none of your business anyway." What you'll have to say is, "Oh dear, have you been talking to my doctor again?"

I also like to remind these people that I know a lot more about my health and weight-related issues than they do. If they didn't want to hear about the Minnesota Starvation Experiment of 1944-45...then why did they mention dieting in the first place?

Of course, if this is someone who you interact with regularly who keeps commenting on your body, you have every right to tell them to stop. And then to going to Human Resources if they continue.

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Your loved ones may be the worst offenders. You could respond by asking something completely unrelated.

"You need to lose a little weight."

"Are you going on vacation this year?"

Or you could give them a book about Health At Every Size for their birthday since they're so interested in the subject. It's a jerk move, but they started.

What Does This Have To Do With Clothing?

I find that it's a lot easier to stand up for myself when I know I look fabulous. I'm not talking about dressing up. I mean dressing in a way that reminds me of my worth. I give myself nice clothes now instead of waiting for someday. I deserve clothes I love and I deserve respect. Just think back to how awful clothes shopping used to make you feel when there weren't many options for plus size women. This is the opposite of that.

You deserve something from our New Arrivals, so shop now.

Check out our other posts about plus size life.

2 Comments

Some really great suggestions here! There are curve-hating trolls everywhere!

—Bill fabrey,

I love this! You bet I’m adding this to my verbal toolkit! Thank you!

—Robin kokemor rangel,

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